Tuesday, July 12, 2011

A Mime is a Terrible thing to Waste...

Why is it that some people feel the need to make themselves feel morally superior when the opportunity arises?  Why can't they fill the emptiness in their lives with donuts or infomercials or ping pong or something more entertaining?  There is a big difference between doing the right thing for the sake of doing the right thing (which is often thankless and difficult ), and simply picking and choosing when and how you can display your morality and depth of "feeling" simply to make yourself feel good, with no real sacrifice on your part.  Ugh.  Never mind.  It's like shouting at a mime-  it doesn't do any good, and you end up looking foolish for trying.

So who was the first professional mime?  Were there at one time roving packs of mimes spread across Europe, but they were eventually hunted nearly to extinction and only survive in mime-protected areas?  Should mimes be a protected species, or are they more of a menace than anything?

Seriously, where did they come from?  Who first thought, "Hey, I'm going to paint my face, wear a beret and a striped shirt & gloves, and pretend to walk against the wind for people!  Yeah, that sounds like a solid career path!"?  It doesn't make any damn sense.  Mimes have been infuriating people for well over a century, I would imagine.  You'd think that after the first mime-beatings,  most would consider pursuing the miming arts a bad idea.  How many mimes have been beat up just in the last 20 years?  I'll bet the numbers are pretty high. I suppose I could simply just look it up on this internet doo-dad, but I find it more entertaining just to rant and rave and speculate on the origin  and statistics of mimes and mimery ( I think I just made up the word "mimery").

It's the Mimetrix.  "I know kung fu..."

He could at least wear some normal shoes.  Look at those things.

 Hope I didn't offend any mimes out there.  Well, that's not true.  I really don't care very much about offending mimes, because I'm pretty sure they're evil.  Or at least kinda evil.  Or just annoying.  Is there a crime based on annoyance?  "Creating a public nuisance", maybe?  That sounds like it was written with mimes in mind....  Maybe we can make a new law about practicing mimery...

Well, that's a little extreme...

Admit it.  Less believeable movies have been made.

This is so fake.  In a real match, this dude wouldn't have made it to the ring without being beaten with 26 folding chairs.

I'm pretty sure the guy in the blue has a gun.

Ok, I'm out of  witty remarks and clever observations.  I think you've had enough, anyway.  I need some food.  Pizza rolls should do nicely, tonight.  Mmmmm...pepperoni....

Now put the mouse slowly on the floor, and kick it away. 



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